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A Three Part Relationship with Your Spouse

Even if you're not married, this post can benefit you and your future spouse...if you are married, you might find out a new way you can connect with your spouse. My husband and I celebrate our 8th anniversary this year; while 8 years is nothing compared to the 40+ my parents have and 60+ my grandparents have, I can undoubtedly say I've learned a lot about marriage over the last 8 years. I'm sure my marriage education started far before I ever got married when I was a kid watching my parents relate, but first-hand experience is a guaranteed fast track education in the area of relationships.

We know as humans that relationships are built on an emotional connection. We find someone we can emotionally relate to and our foundation is formed. Either you found something similar that connects you, or you found something totally different that you wish you had, but the two of you formed a bond that goes deeper than any surface level acquaintance.

Another connection, and not necessarily the second in sequence but certainly the most popular, is a physical connection. Whether it's a friend or a love interest, when we have a relationship with someone, there is a physical connection. With a friend, it might be that they look like you, they look like someone you once knew, or they are your polar opposite and you love that about them. If it's a love interest or spouse, it's attraction. There's a magnet inside you that draws you to him/her. The attraction makes all your insides heat up, your heart beat faster and your face have a stupid grin every time you see him/her. There's a chemistry within the two of you that reacts in a way that makes things sizzle. And for some reason there's an innate desire for you to find the person that perfectly completes you and complements you. 

The third tie that bonds us is a spiritual connection. When you and your spouse learn to connect on a spiritual level with Jesus, your relationship goes to levels you never knew existed. When Jesus enters the relationship as a third party, conversations, fights and decisions include him. The burden of working things out all on your own lifts and now you have an adviser that can counsel you through all life situations. His love for us individually allows us to love unconditionally. Our relationship together with him breaks down walls of the unforgivable and builds an unshakable foundation of love that cannot be broken. Summoning up love from within your own being will leave you dry and empty, but receiving love from the Father and pouring it out on a spouse is endless and bountiful. 

A relationship built solely on emotional and physical relationship can be easily broken by turmoil, disloyalty, dishonesty and the physical effects of an ever changing body and body image. A relationship with all three connections is a relationship that does not shake easily. A relationship with all three connections is a relationship that can withstand the hardships, stress and trials of life. 

If you've found someone or are married to someone that you have the first two connections with, I want to encourage you to seek the third one together. Start praying together, seeking God together and encouraging each other in your own spiritual journeys. You won't be disappointed when the third tie that bonds adds another dimension to your relationship that strengthens and uplifts both of you at the same time. 
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