Responsibilities as a Preacher’s Wife

Upon introductions, we often ask the other person what he/she does. The easiest way to answer that question for me is to say, “A preacher’s wife full-time and a teacher part-time.” Even though this perfectly describes my role, it leaves people wondering what a preacher’s wife actually does to warrant “full-time” status. Some quick questions I can answer upfront are: 

1. Is “preacher’s wife” an actual job title? No, not really. The closest example to “preacher’s wife” I can think of is the First Lady. There are a certain amount of expectations that come with the role, but there are few requirements I have to fulfill.
2. Does a preacher’s wife get paid for what she does? No. I volunteer my time freely and wouldn’t expect payment. I’m sure at a bigger church if I had an actual job to report to that I’d get paid, but at our micro-church no such position is needed.

Pi Party

Like I said before, I answer to no one as far as a boss or supervisor, so there is very little required of me. Sure, there are PLENTY of expectations and traditions that I try to fulfill, but I guess technically I could do nothing and still be a preacher’s wife. Those expectations include: wedding showers, baby showers, weddings, funerals, birthday parties, regular parties, house groups, leading the ladies, kissing babies and shaking hands. Basically, I try to be as supportive and loving as possible to everyone that comes into our lives. We like to celebrate the good and mourn the bad. We like to walk out the day-to-day and live out the years with the people we consider family.

90s themed New Year's Party

BUT my most important responsibility and the one that I take most seriously – the one I hold above all other responsibilities – is to support my husband, the preacher. It is my honor and privilege to support, pray, encourage, partner, motivate and love on my preacher man. His job may seem easy, but the toll it can take on him emotionally, mentally and spiritually is costly. I do my very best to remain a light and encouragement for him, no matter what he is facing.

1.       Support: I am on my husband’s side; I honor and respect him in every way that I know how. I’m there cheering him on for everything he tries, and I’m there when things work out or when they don’t. I am there for him.

Picking him up after
a mission trip.

2.       Pray: I pray for my husband constantly. I pray during his sermons, while he’s away from me and while he’s with me. I pray for him on the bad days; I pray for him on the good days. We pray together; we pray for each other.

3.       Encourage: Everyone needs someone clapping for them from the sidelines or even on the court. When he throws in the towel because of exhaustion, I pick it up and hold it until he’s ready. I encourage him to either keep going or to rest depending on the situation.  Lastly, I encourage him to find joy in every situation.

4.       Partner: We are partners, but we are one. We are personally involved in every facet of each other’s lives. Our partnership is strong because God knit us together as one unit.

5.       Motivate: Just like he does for me, when he calls with discouragement in his voice, I remind him of God’s words over his life and of our calling. I remind him that God and I have his back no matter what; nothing else matters.

6.       Love: “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” (1 Corinthians 13:13). Also, “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” (Ephesians 4:2). Lastly, “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8). Love binds us together in perfect unity, but without first feeling the Father’s love, we have no love to give. We let God’s love fill us, and we pour it out on each other as best we can.

Maybe full-time doesn’t mean I’m at the church all day doing paperwork, but it does mean that I am there for my husband and the church whenever they call. I love this role, and I love our partner dynamics. My prayer today is that God would continue to strengthen our bond, teach us how to love more fully and encourage us every day.